Late last year, Amy came home from work and found me in the upstairs hallway, curled up in a fetal position, crying from intense back pain.
After weeks of trying to tough my way through the intense pain, I had to face facts and seek medical help. An MRI showed extensive deterioration and lingering damage that — if left untreated — could leave me in a wheelchair within weeks.
Seven weeks of surgical back procedures began, followed by four months of extensive physical rehabilitation. On March 15, I celebrated recovery by climbing on my Harley Davidson for my first ride since early November of 2010.
Some of that period is — and will most likely remain — a blur. At one point I was so stoned on morphine and Valium that friends wondered if I would ever be the same. I learned — to my horror — that one of the web sites I managed at the time was down for more than a week. I have no memory of that happening.
Thankfully, I’ve recovered but I’m not the same. My close call with extreme physical disability led to a re-evaluation of life, purpose and focus.
Life is precious. So is the limited time we have left on this earth. I’ve been fortunate enough to enjoy several lifetimes of adventure during my 63-and-a-half years. A series of emotional ups and down have marked the last two years, brought on in large part by my mother’s declining health and also by some extremely personal joys that cannot be discussed here.
After a lifetime of plunging headlong into public and private battles I’ve grown weary of politics, debate and confrontation. More often I seek the solitude of the open road from the saddle of a Harley-Davidson.
It’s time to enjoy life, soak up the peace and beauty of the world around us and turn my attention and camera lenses to the joys of life.
Others can carry on the good fight.
I’ve served the cause. Time to enjoy life and family.
More to come…
1 thought on “Realization, reflection and redirection”
You’ve been blessed with a life of adventure and ‘action’ as myself, but through a different venue.
As I’ve aged, the things of nature and that which is natural has fascinated me. I have acreage as yourself.
You might consider learning moreso of that which grows and lives near your doorstep.
I’ve read books on animal tracks, birding and statebased flora and fauna. I purchased a stereo microscope to enjoy details within specimens I’ve collected and as described in textbooks and on the web.
Most all are gathered from my property. I’ve made an effort to learn the names of all the grasses, trees and weeds on my land. You feel greater kinship with the land and your friend the creatures that inhabit your property.
It might not be your cup of tea, but sometimes pursuing that which is simple and close to oneself is the path to enlightenment and peace.
Enjoy your open road meditations, but there’s even more to found closer to home and yourself my friend in in thought.
One of my favorite quotes:
“I’d like to live as a poor man with lots of money.” ~Pablo Picasso
The same could be said concerning one’s rich materialistic lifestyle as opposed to being steeped in introspection and wisdom garnered through life’s experiences.
Be well my friend in thought! : )
Carl Nemo **==
p.s. There’s no need to abandon the “good fight”. The secret is to keep things in perspective without being consumed emotionally via the analysis of such. Your thoughts are valued by a host of www readers. : )
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